The all-important first page

cj Sez:  Some writers’ conferences offer writers opportunities to pitch their stories to agents or editors. Pre-conference submission of a chapter or a few pages for consideration is also popular.

One conference I attended offered participants a chance to have the first page of their manuscripts reviewed by three publishers. (I’m sure other conferences have done something similar.) The idea was to critique one page and then give the writer an idea of how successful the manuscript might be in getting a request to see more. The publishers stopped reading some of the submissions before finishing the page.

The submissions ranged from fiction to non-fiction and adult to YA, but the rejected pages seemed to have similar problems. The judges identified four blatant writing miscues that caused them to stop reading.

** The story’s opening paragraphs failed to establish where the

story was taking place, the time, and the setting.

** The beginning was too slow. Too many details, too much description, too much backstory, or too many characters—and all of that on the first page—caused the judges to lose interest. The opening paragraphs also lacked action or a hook to entice the readers to continue to read.

** The writer didn’t establish a clear point of view. She/he headhopped or mixed first or third person with omniscient points of view. Remember, we’re talking only the first page here.

** Mechanical errors earned rejection. Yep, writing has mechanics, and it is vital that you know them. So, what are mechanical errors? They are the typos, punctuation errors (a lot of them involving the commas and quotation marks of dialogue), and unclear syntax that can destroy a good story.   

What the agent or publisher sees in the first few paragraphs of a manuscript is what they expect to see throughout each chapter and scene. I plan to use the list to analyze a short story I’ve just started, to make sure I stay on target.

If you re-read the first paragraphs of your manuscript, would you see any of these miscues?

Lyrical Pens would love to hear how you construct a first page. Do you re-write yours? I usually re-write mine many times as I work through a manuscript.

Another novel by my publisher... California Bound is Old West action and a love story, co-authored by Frank Kelso and John O’Melveny Woods.  Available on Amazon

http://amzn.to/2vZtIxL

Please keep all those in the path of Hurricane Harvey in your prayers as they deal with the devastation caused by this storm.

Okay, you-all guys keep on keeping on, and I’ll try to do the same.

cj

Find more about my publications at: 

“Bad Day at Round Rock” short story in The Posse anthology @ http://amzn.to/2lQRvcD

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Simon&Schuster Author Page     Amazon Central Author Page

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Writing is a constant learning process

cj Sez:  You know how, after filling a three-ring binder with rejections (as one writer I know did), we writers worry if our writing will ever be “good enough” to get published?

Feelings of inadequacy can often overwhelm any confidence in our ability and send us running for a big spoon and the nearest half-gallon of chocolate ice cream for comfort. (Oh, okay, that’s my solution.)

But think about this: Bona fide professional writers do not, cannot rest on their laurels. That’s a cliché, but truly, professionals continually work to improve and perfect their skills. Pro golfers take lessons; powerhouse baseball hitters work with coaches and trainers as do Olympic athletes of every stripe.

Every time Donald Maass, author of WRITING THE BREAKOUT NOVEL, leads a workshop on writing, I’d venture to guess he shares some knowledge he’s learned since his last workshop. I know he keeps producing how-to books that incorporate new slants on writing. He’s a professional who keeps on analyzing the craft and learning fresh ways to produce a well-written novel that appeals to the whims of an ever-changing audience.

The lesson is clear.

Achieving some modicum of brand-name recognition in a vocation bursting at the seams with authors is more than a little difficult. The way serious authors can achieve a favored niche among readers is to practice their craft…read in their chosen genre(s), study and analyze the work of best-selling authors, read how-to books, attend workshops, and network. 

And those tasks never cease.

I know I can learn something new most every day, some nugget that I can incorporate into a work-in-progress (as I did today) or add to my growing list of helpful hints. I wish you the same success.

I think I’ll be watching the total eclipse on television August 21, because rain is forecast for my area. If you’re in a sunny zone and are going outside to watch, please be sure to protect your eyes.

Okay, you-all guys keep on keeping on, and I’ll try to do the same . . . and please check out the great book bargains listed below.

cj

NOW ON AMAZON:  Really amazing, super-duper deals for your escape into romance reading.  A Crimson Romance bundle of novels about athletes and the sports they love, Bodies in Motion, includes my novel, Choosing Carter.  10 wonderful reads for 99 cents on Amazon  Plus More Than Friends and California Kisses romance bundles are still available also at 99-cents.

My “Bad Day at Round Rock” short story is in The Posse anthology @ http://amzn.to/2lQRvcD  (8 short Western stories, still at 99 cents)

A termination clause and new launches

cj Sez: In the did-you-know department:

There are only two English words that use all the vowels in the correct order.  Do you know what they are?   (Answer at the bottom of this post.)

Important publishing contract information available at Writers in the Storm blog:  

What to Look for in “Out of Print” Termination Clauses

By Guest Blogger  Susan Spann

The “out of print” clause is often one of an author’s only ways to terminate a publishing contract unilaterally (a legal term that means “one-sided”—and, in this case, means the author’s right to terminate without the publisher’s consent).

 Out of print clauses are not relevant to self-publishing, and should never appear in self-publishing terms of use.

Read the rest of her post here: http://writersinthestormblog.com/2017/08/what-to-look-for-in-out-of-print-termination-clauses/

Susan Spann is a California transactional attorney whose practice focuses on publishing law and business, and is also the author of the Hiro Hattori (Shinobi) mysteries, featuring ninja detective Hiro Hattori and Portuguese Jesuit Father Mateo. 

***

Watch for these great, new reads . . .  

•   

Day of the Dark - There’s a total solar eclipse doing a cross-wise thing across North America on August 21…observe it with the proper solar sunglasses to save your eyesight, please…  but the anthology from Kaye George for which you may only need reading glasses, is available now.  (P.S. The next total solar eclipse to cross North America won’t happen until April 8, 2024, so don’t wait to order.)

Novel blurb: “A recipe for disaster: take one total solar eclipse, add two dozen spine-chilling mysteries, and shake the reader until the world ends in Day of the Dark!” 

Available from Westside Press at  http://bit.ly/2w1zJsT

And from Amazon at  http://amzn.to/2vtI7k3

•   Trouble in Dixie (Familiar Legacy Book 2) Kindle Edition

by Rebecca Barrett  (Author)

Novel blurb:  OLD MONEY AND FRESH MURDER -- Trouble, a savvy black cat with a penchant for sleuthing, has landed in the cream of Savannah society. So has a murderer and art thief. 

This is book 2 in a new series written by multiple authors who follow the antics of super-sleuth Trouble as he lands in first one crime scene then another. Of course, the humans help a little. These romantic mysteries are fun and light hearted and just perfect for a beach read or a rainy day.

E-book launch date August 14, available from Amazon at: http://amzn.to/2vpjkuy

(A reader of an advance review copy has already given this novel a 5-Star review.)

•   California Bound - For a chance to win a prize, mark your calendar to stop by the CALIFORNIA BOUND Launch Party on Aug 16, 8-9:30 PM at http://www.facebook.com/CABoundBook/   Prizes include Amazon Cards, jewelry, and books.

Novel blurb: Lawmen won’t … The Cavalry can’t … 2 Civil War veterans wade the Rio Bravo to find a stolen girl!  In a Union POW camp, Jeb & Zach dreamed of California Gold, but the road West leads Jeb to his sis's home in Texas.

Jeb & Zach are God-fearing, hard-working, honest Southern boys--if you don’t count stealing Gen. Sherman’s horse.

Available from Amazon at http://amzn.to/2vZtIxL

 ***

And just because I love the rendition of this Allison Krauss song on YouTube:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?list=RDzSif77IVQdY&v=1BPoMIQHwpo

"To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded."  - Ralph Waldo Emerson 

ANSWER to did-you-know

Abstemious

Facetious

Okay, that’s all for today. You-all guys keep on keeping on, and I’ll try to do the same.

cj

Read on for a brief word from my sponsors: NOW ON AMAZON: Amazing, super-duper deals for your summer romance reading.  A Crimson Romance bundle of novels about athletes and the sports they love, Bodies in Motion, includes my novel, Choosing Carter.  10 wonderful reads for 99 cents on Amazon  Plus More Than Friends and California Kisses romance bundles are still available also at 99-cents.

My “Bad Day at Round Rock” short story is in The Posse anthology @ http://amzn.to/2lQRvcD  (8 short Western stories, still at 99 cents)

cjpetterson/author on Facebook    

Amazon Central Author Page      Simon&Schuster Author Page   

blog at: www.lyricalpens.com

newsletter sign-up at cjpetterson@gmail.com

Keeping your story organized

cj Sez: I’m not a plotter when it comes to writing stories. That is to say, I don't outline, but neither am I a real pantser. I think of myself as somewhere in between…a pathfinder.

If you’re not familiar with the term, this is what I mean:

   

I write the first line and first paragraph and first page (subject to continual emending), and I know how I want the story to end. Not exactly how I want it to end because I’m also a linear writer. I write each scene and chapter in its time so ideas for the exact last scene won’t start to develop until about two or three chapters from the end. Once the opening is decided, I start putting obstacles in the way of the protagonist and figuring out how to overcome them; i.e., I find the path characters will take on their quest. After a few chapters, I know more about the direction the story is headed, so I type up a possible outline, knowing full well that it’s going to change.

Writing is an exploration. You start from nothing and learn as you go.            E. L. Doctorow

All the upcoming unknown conflicts and resolutions notwithstanding, the biggest challenge for me is keeping track of everything. What color eyes did I give that character? How tall is s/he? Did s/he have a limp in chapter two? The name started with a “B,” didn’t it? What’s her problem? What does s/he want more than anything else in the world…and that very important question must also be answered for the antagonist. In the romance genre, the protagonist’s goal has to be happily ever after or at least some promise of HEA.

I understand that Scrivener has solutions for all that, but I don’t own Scrivener. A friend of mine uses 3x5 cards. Another tapes pieces of paper on the wall and uses different colors for characters, plot lines, and threads that need to be resolved. So, how do I keep my manuscript organized? I input those things into a Word document or an Excel spreadsheet. I use Word to do the character sketches and Excel to track the timelines of the scenes and chapters.

After I write the opening, I open Word to create a bio for the protagonist. Physical description, where born, when born, where s/he grew up (affects how they talk/think), likes/dislikes, and flaws (all protagonists have to have flaws so readers can relate to them). I do the same thing for every character I introduce into the manuscript, including any animals. In a perfect world, I update the bios as I go along because a new character’s

description or name often affects a previous one. These bios are vital for me to create true scenes and realistic dialogue. I want to know my characters so well that I immediately know how they will react in a given situation, what they will say and how it’s said, and what they will not do.

When I create the antagonist, I also give him/her some type of sympathetic or positive characteristic that shows up on a page somewhere. Maybe the murderer picks up stray dogs and cats and takes them to a no-kill animal shelter which he helps support financially. Yeah, that’s a bit sappy, but you see what I mean. In Deadly Star, one antagonist is a psychopath who’s intelligent, sexy-looking in a dangerous way, and loves his work. He also admires the hero and considers him a worthy opponent.

I use an Excel spreadsheet to track the timelines and to make sure all the threads are continued/resolved and characters show up when they should.

Across the top, I put the chapter numbers and under them the number of scenes. Down the sides, I put the character names and then a brief line or word about the plot/thread lines that I color-code in a bold block font to make sure I write resolutions. To make it easy for mysteries, I use green when a clue shows up in a scene and a red for red herrings. I also spell these out in a separate Word document…what, which chapter/scene, when resolved or explained.

I also note the day and time of each scene on the spreadsheet. These are usually nondescript and imaginary times. In my current work-in-progress, I’ve mentioned Mardi Gras, so I have to be sure that the thread continues in some fashion and nothing in any scene contradicts that season…and it is a “season” in Mobile, not a day. Using a real date means you’re locked in to real history.

If I forget to update at the end of a writing session. it is almost a certainty that a few days later I will discover I absolutely need that updated information. That’s when I spend way too much time playing catch-up.

Okay, that’s it for today. You-all guys keep on keeping on, and I’ll try to do the same.

How do you keep track of your characters, scenes, and plot lines? If you’ve got an easier way, I would LOVE to hear about it. (Thanks.)

cj

And a word from my sponsors . . .  NOW ON AMAZON:  Really amazing, super-duper deals for your summer romance reading.  A Crimson Romance bundle of 10 novels about athletes and the sports they love, Bodies in Motion,Choosing Carter.  10 wonderful reads for 99 cents on Amazon  Plus More Than Friends and California Kisses romance bundles are still available also at 99-cents.

includes my novel,

My “Bad Day at Round Rock” short story is in The Posse anthology @ http://amzn.to/2lQRvcD  (8 short Western stories, still at 99 cents)

cjpetterson/author on Facebook    

Simon&Schuster Author Page     Amazon Central Author Page

blog at: www.lyricalpens.com

newsletter sign-up at cjpetterson@gmail.com